my ♥ and everything in it

when it comes to college shopping, there are certain necessities that a students must have. these include a laptop, a printer, some school supplies, bedsheets, etc. up until last weekend, i lacked a printer BUT THIS IS THE ULTRA COOL ONE I GOT

bleeping awesome is all i have to say. bleeping troublesome is also something else i can say. so this morning (10.4.08), i was trying to print onto this printable cd when my printer screams – CARRIAGE JAM. the window pops up on my screen giving me directions to solve the problem. i follow the instructions as closely as i would… a steal at some store (WHAT DID YOU THINK I WAS GOING TO SAY?!). anyways, i call the 800 number for hp support. it’s one of those speaktheworditellyoutosoastodirectyourcalltotheproperdepartment. i get this filipino lady. after 20 minutes of bad reception, she gets my email address and name. then she tells me that she can’t help me because it isn’t in her department so i’m directed to technical support. EXCEPT FOR THE FACT THAT I DO RECALL I ALREADY SAID “TECHNICAL SUPPORT” WHEN THE ELECTRONIC OPERATOR TOLD ME TO. so then, i get this indian guy. he tells me the same directions, but as a bonus, tells me to plug the printer into a wall jack and clean the rollers of the printer. but they wouldn’t be dirty since i haven’t printed anything intense but those effing lecture outlines and whatnot :/. after another 20 minutes, he puts me on hold to talk to his supervisor about the problem. there’s this tricky tricky manufacturer’s secret where you have to press “print photos” and “red eye removal” simultaneously so you can like reset the printer. i skip to the “partial reset” choice. it shuts down. starts up. CARRIAGE JAM. the indian guy talks to his supervisor again. he tells me to press the same tricky keys excpet this time, we kick it up a notch – SEMI-FULL RESET. it shuts down. starts up. CARRIAGE JAM. i’m put on hold for another 10 minutes. THIS IS NOW FIFTY MINUTES PEOPLE. so the head honcho named LIONEL tells me that my printer will be replaced by another one for FREE good news, right? anyways. i give him my address at uci, a credit card number for collateral, and i hang up the phone after a HELLA LONG CHAIN UP THE ECHELON OF SUPPORT TECHNICIANS.

not too long after, i get this confirmation email. i’m happy because i get a new printer. i open a link included in the email and guess what? THEY SPELLED MY NAME WRONG -  JESSEO VILOETAS. like… WTF. i even spelled it out like.. (jesus elephant sandwich sandwhich elephant lollipop, ETC.) so i have to call them AGAIN. same voice-recognition for the menu. then i get a new filipino lady. she asks for my name. LIKE WTF AGAIN? so i just tell her what my problem is before having to get caught in another cycle. after 20 minutes, she finally tells me she can’t access the file, even though she had asked me how to spell my name correctly. she transfers me to another department. some white guy picks up and is ultra friendly. (PAUSE. the hold music is supposed to like… entertain you and whatnot because it’s so damn happy, but as julia says, “this music makes me want to kill myself” – NOT EMO). he helps me out and hopefully, my named is spelled correctly this time. i’m crossing my fingers here since they didn’t send me a confirmation email this time :/

THANKS HP. I LOVE YOU TOO